Saturday, July 21, 2012

Alexa's Birth Story

She's here! She's here! She's FINALLY here!

So, at 7:30 pm on Tuesday, July 10th, my husband and I drove up to the hospital to begin the induction process since she refused to come naturally. I got into my room, into their gown, and simply had to wait out the night after they inserted the Cervadil to help dilate me since I was still a big, fat zero on that scale.

Morning comes, and I'm checked again. 


I was devastated. Completely heartbroken. I had waited so long for my child and I was going to have to go home without her. 

I didn't get out of bed for the rest of the day. I cried more than I thought possible. I pleaded with her to PLEASE come out on her own. Didn't she want to see me? Did she already not like me? Those kinds of thoughts clouded my head for the next three days.

Fast forward to Sunday night. Same tune, different song. Check in, gown up, wait-and-see. However, I didn't have to wait very long this time. About an hour after the Cervadil was inserted, my water broke. YES! That's when the nurse said that most beautiful thing I had ever heard up to that point, 

"You're not leaving here without your baby, now."

Oh, how I cried. 

They wanted to track my natural contractions overnight. So after being harnessed up to one of the most awkward machines ever, I was told to try and sleep. Yeah, right. After about three hours, my contractions stopped completely, and they were forced to begin the Pitocin at 3:00 Monday morning.

Oh, my heavens. If any of you have ever had that injected into your body, you have my immediate respect. To say the contractions they produced were hellish would be a gross understatement. By the time they came in eight hours later to give me the epidural, I was screaming. My sweet husband kept saying over and over how much he wished he could take the pain from me and do it himself. He absolutely hated seeing me like that. 

After the epidural was in place, life was SO much better. I actually managed to get some sleep. But, by 3:00 in the afternoon, the pain was back with a vengeance. I was dilated to a 7 by this point and even though the awesome anesthetist kept coming back to tweak the medication, nothing really helped for very long. By the time I was dilated to a 9, I had been in labor for 17 of the longest hours of my life. When Dr. Jerkhole came in to check my cervix for the last time, I was told that the baby was too big and that I would be having her via C-Section. 

Uhm. Excuse me?

Does anyone remember this post? Yeah. At that doctor's appointment, he said that every mother felt like her baby would be too big to deliver and that he was, under no circumstances, going to perform an ultrasound on me unless there was a medical reason to.

So, when the doctor said that I'd be getting the surgery, I looked him right in the eye, gritted through another heinous contraction and said,

"I told you I'd need a C-Section five weeks ago. I told you she would be too big for me. You would have been able to tell if you had just done the ultrasound like I asked you to."

He said nothing.

Nick was told to scrub up, and I was prepped for surgery. I tell you, the preparation took longer than the surgery itself. My arms were strapped down, I was numbed up, and surgery began at 5:17. At 5:23, my daughter was born. I was told to look to my right, and there she was. The first words that escaped my lips were, 

"She's real! Nick, she's real!"

Nick went with the baby to clean her up, and I was left to be stitched up. Bob, a sweet, older gentleman who was also the anesthetist, held my hand while they finished up because I could not stop shaking during the entire procedure. I felt horrible when I threw up on him. 

Two hours later they finally brought me back upstairs where Alexa, Nick and his entire family were waiting. I was gingerly placed in my hospital bed and Nick finally put my baby in my arms for the first time. I couldn't help it, I cried so hard. She was the most beautiful thing I had ever seen, and she was mine. I fell in love instantly.

We have been home for two days now, and I still cry at everything because my stupid hormones are coming down. My angel of a mother has stayed with me since I was released from the hospital and she has been a tremendous blessing. She's made wonderful meals, purchased food for us and just watched over my baby so that I could sleep. Even though I'm unnaturally emotional right now, I still think I'd cry because of all that she's done for me.

Alexa is an angel and I love her more than I thought possible. I still burst into tears whenever I stop and stare at her because she is, honestly, the most gorgeous thing I have ever laid my eyes on. Sleep is such a burden to me because all I want to do is snuggle her forever. I get anxious when she's not in the room with me. I hurt when she cries. She is such a mellow and sweet baby. Nick and I are very, very lucky.

I am terrified that I'm going to wake up and be 15 weeks pregnant again. So, every night before I go to sleep, I try to memorize every part of her. I cannot wait to be back to physical working order so that I can lie on the floor next to her, or pick her up without pain. 

Sorry if this post is way too sappy for your liking. Firstly, I don't care. And secondly, it's hard to be sarcastic or witty on three hours of sleep. 

Thank you all for your support throughout my pregnancy. I would have lost my sanity without you!

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  1. Bless your heart! I understand how you feel - I had a C- section, too - and I kept telling the doc it was going to happen and they still made me go 2 weeks overdue! grrrrr
    BUT you have your precious little darlin' now - she is such a little dollbaby! congrats!!

  2. Oh girl I'm so sorry you had to go through that! My labor took 19 hours if that makes you feel any better?! I'm so happy for you though that she's here!! ;) It does get better I promise, your horomones will balance out soon ish! Enjoy cuddling her!! I know I love snuggling mine! ;)

  3. Congratulations! She's so heartmeltingly beautiful that I don't even care that "heartmeltingly" is not a word. :)

    Although, I'll have to admit that I'm going to miss all of the funny, snarky pregnancy posts; but I suppose now there will be plenty of funny, snarky new mommy posts to look forward to.

    Here's hoping you don't get the boatload of unwanted, (or in my case, INSANE) parenting advice that I got right after having my son. (...My son's father's mom actually had the nerve (or mental illness?) to suggest that I put a little WHISKEY in my son's bottle to help him with teething pain AND that I try smoking a little marijuana before bed to help me sleep though him crying at night! Some people's stupidity really knows no bounds, I guess.)

  4. Michelle, congratulations! Stupid doctors not listening to the mamas. Don't they know by now that we ALWAYS know our bodies (and our babies) better than they do? I'm so glad that you are enjoying her so much and I hope the baby euphoria continues for weeks to come. :)

  5. Congratulations!! She's beautiful :)

    <3 Jamie

  6. She is beautiful--and I really think she looks like you, except with dark hair :)Hope you heal up as quickly as possible. Congrats!!

  7. Michelle - I am so happy for you and Nick and Alexa! You and Nick are blessed to be Alexa's parents and Alexa is blessed to have you as parents. Enjoy the newest addition to your family!

  8. She's beautiful! Congratulations!

  9. Those cheeks, oh those beautiful baby cheeks! Congratulations and welcome home!

  10. She is absolutely beautiful! Congrats! I missed your posts while you were busy having a baby!!

  11. oh wow! I loved reading this story...seriously brought back so many memories. I remember crying and coming off those hormones - like literally crying when my husband walked in the room because I loved him so much....ha!! and I was induced too and had that cervidil placed in me - ohhh the memories! congrats on you sweet precious baby! it only gets better from here! When people ask me what my favorite all time memory is - it's the hospital memories with my husband...that's just an experience that nobody can ever take away. ok - better stop now before I cry! ha. Loving your blog!


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